


Gabrielle, Goddess of Death

by daviderl



Series: Gabrielle, Goddess of . . . . [8]
Category: Xena: Warrior Princess
Genre: F/F, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-04-20
Updated: 2013-04-20
Packaged: 2017-12-09 01:25:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 4,424
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/768362
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/daviderl/pseuds/daviderl
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Gabrielle realizes she has been Healing the same warriors over and over. <br/>But what is the limit? When does it become TOO many times?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. A God's Memory

**Gabrielle, Goddess of Death**

  
**Chapter One**   
**A God's Memory**   


“Gabrielle, don’t you see what what’s going on? How can you keep doing this, knowing . . . .”

“Xena, I can’t let them die! I’m the Goddess of Healing, you know that! How can you ask me to just . . . ?”

“But you’re playing right into Ares’ hands! Every time you Heal one of these soldiers, they go right back into battle. How many times do they have to kill other soldiers, or innocent villagers, before you realize what you’re doing is WRONG?!”

“So I’m supposed to let them suffer and die just because they’re warriors? Besides, how do you know I’ve Healed them more than once?”

“Come on, Gabrielle, think about it. How many times have you taken us to battlefields just like this? And how many soldiers and warriors have you Healed. Surely, you must realize you’ve saved the same ones over and over.”

As Gabrielle surveyed the field of battle strewn with the dead and dying, she said, “I have to go to them, Xena. I have to do what I can to save as many of them as I can.”

“I know. But do this – you have a god’s memory; look into their faces as you Heal them. You’ll know if you’ve saved them before. Will you do that?”

“If it’s that important to you, yes, I will. Now, I need you to help bring them to me. You know who needs my help the most. And you can get those whose wounds aren’t as severe to help. You’ve done this many times before. If you don’t mind.”

“Gabrielle, I don’t want to see anyone suffer, no matter which side they were fighting for. Of course I’ll help.”

As Xena began to organize the walking wounded, Gabrielle went to the first fallen warrior, a boy in his mid teens. She knelt down to him and placed one hand on his side, covering the gaping, bleeding wound where he’d been stabbed by a sword and then cut open as it was jerked out of him. As the soft violet glow emanating from her hand began the Healing, Gabrielle looked into the boy’s frightened eyes, but she had never seen him before. It may have been his first battle.

“So young.” She said softly, the sadness evident in her voice.

When she was finished, the boy sat up, grateful that the pain was gone and that he was alive.

“Have you seen my sword?” He asked her.

“You don’t need a sword,” She replied. “You need to go home to your family and leave all this behind you.”

“But I’m a warrior! I can’t just leave, desert my comrades!”

“Do you think I Healed you just so you could go out and do this all over again?”

“But I’m a soldier. It’s my duty to fight.”

Gabrielle wanted to argue the point, wanted to convince him he should be home with his family, but there were too many others that needed her help.

“Go home!” She told him in her most authoritative godly voice, and turned to the next man.

This man she recognized. She had Healed him only a month ago. Then it was an arm that was cut to the bone and he was bleeding to death. This time it was a severe head gash just above where his ear used to be. Without a word to him, she did her Healing then moved to the next one.

For half a day she laid her hands on them, Healing and comforting them. But she began to realize just how many of them had been helped by her before. Some as many as four or five times before. Then came the one. Gabrielle knelt down for the sixtieth, or maybe the seventieth time, to save a life. The man was bleeding badly from the neck where an axe had been buried deep. He was holding his wound with one hand, his sword gripped tightly in the other.

As Gabrielle gently placed her hand over the gash, she heard him whisper, barely able to gurgle, “Goddess, we meet again.”

When she looked at his face, she recognized him. She had done this for him a half dozen times before. His sword was stained with the blood of the many lives he had taken. Gabrielle knew she should not save his life again. But it was hard to fight against her own conscience. She was the Goddess of Healing, how could she let this one die but not the next, nor the next after that?

And if she did let him die, where would his spirit go? Where should it? As a brave and loyal warrior, the obvious answer was the Elysian Fields. But what if he had killed innocent villagers – women and children? Then he surely should be sent to Tartarus. But what if he killed innocents by accident, or hadn’t at all? How was she to know?

“Hades.” She thought to herself. “I’ll let HIM make the decision. I know he’ll be fair. He will only keep those that deserve to remain in Tartarus.”

Slowly, the violet glow that eased the man’s pain turned black as the Goddess of Healing gently ended his life.

As Xena brought the injured to her, Gabrielle continued to Heal those she hadn’t done so before, and the ones she remembered helping time after time. But she was still troubled – where should she draw the line? At four, or five, or six times? She finally decided four would be the limit. At number five she would allow them to Crossover, even if she had to give them a slight push. But she would always ease their pain so the Crossing would be easier for them.

As she moved from soldier to soldier, Gabrielle sensed Hades’ thanks for sending them to him, and his assurance that he would do just as she had hoped – the deserving would spend eternity in the Elysian Fields and the remainder would go to Tartarus. But this gave her small comfort.

Just before sunset it was over. The battle field was all but cleared. Those Gabrielle had Healed had either gone home (she hoped), had left to find their commanders to rejoin their army, or had taken the dead to be buried. Gabrielle and Xena were about to leave themselves when Ares appeared in front of Gabrielle, angrier than either one had ever seen him.

“What do you think you’re doing!” He shouted at Gabrielle. “You’re supposed to be Healing these soldiers, not letting them die!”

“But I’ve Healed them so many times . . . .”

“You’re killing my best warriors! What kind of army do you think it will be with nothing but inexperienced amateurs?”

As he was ranting at her, Ares was advancing on Gabrielle, and she was backing away from him.

“You either do your job, or so help me I’ll . . . !”

Despite the fact that Gabrielle was immortal, and in her own way was as powerful as Ares, Xena stepped between them, facing Ares.

“Or you’ll WHAT!” she demanded of Ares, a snarl on her lips, her hand on her Chakram.

Surprised at her interference, Ares was at a loss for words, and after several moments made a threatening noise, then disappeared.

Xena immediately turned to Gabrielle. “You all right?” she asked.

“Yeah, sure, I – I guess. I don’t know why I let him intimidate me like that. I just . . . .”

“Don’t worry about it. I’m used to his ways. Soon enough you’ll be barking right back at him,” Xena said, smiling, one hand on Gabrielle’s shoulder.

Gabrielle gave her a small, uncertain smile. “If you say so.”

 


	2. "You Can't Have It Both Ways"

 

  
**Chapter Two**   
**"You Can't Have It Both Ways"**

All the while Xena was setting up camp, she was aware of Gabrielle’s restlessness. Finally, she knew she had to say something.

“Want to talk about it?”

“No. Yes. I don’t know. I’m so mixed up. I want so badly to do the right thing, but now it seems like whatever I do is wrong. Some I let die, and others I kept alive. But what if I Healed the wrong ones? What if I let a horrible murderer live and let someone die who is honest and good but just got caught up in the horror of war?”

“I can’t answer that, Gabrielle. Only the Fates . . . .”

“But don’t you see? All this time I’ve been controlling people’s destiny and taking it out of the hands of the Fates! And now I’ve even taken Celesta’s power of death. I don’t know how to deal with it. What’s wrong with me?”

“Nothing! Nothing’s wrong with you. You – you’re still finding your way. Gabrielle, I guess we all thought being a god was easy, and we never appreciated what being one demands. Maybe they’ve had to make compromises in order to, I don’t know, get along? Look, after a good night’s sleep I’m sure things will sort themselves out.”

“Xena, I don’t sleep, remember?”

“I was talking about me. Sometimes if I go to sleep thinking about a problem, the next morning things seem much clearer.”

“Maybe you’re right. It’s been a long day. Why don’t you turn in for the night?”

“So, what are you going to do in the meantime?”

“I was thinking about making a few visits. I think I should talk to the experts, you know -- Aphrodite, Hades, The Fates, possibly even Ares.”

“I don’t know about Ares. I think for now you should stay away from him, at least until he cools off some. I know he can’t kill you, but he can make things difficult.”

“Yeah, you’re probably right, again. You get some sleep and I’ll see you in the morning.”

 

The next morning when Xena woke up Gabrielle was sitting on a fallen tree truck, watching her.

“So how long have you been sitting there?” Xena asked as she threw off her sleeping furs and stretched.

“Most of the night. It didn’t take me long to talk to the other gods.”

“So what did they say?”

“Well, I went to Aphrodite first. She wasn’t much help. She said she does what she does, and if it works out, then fine. If it doesn’t, well, too bad.”

“I suppose that’s one way of looking at things. So who else did you go to?”

“Next I went to see the Fates.”

“And . . . ?”

“They said that whatever I do has already been predestined, no matter how many I save, or how many I let die. A lot of help THEY were!”

“It sounds like they were letting you off the hook.”

“But I don’t want to be off the hook! I want to do what’s right!”

“Talk to anyone else?”

“Yeah. Next I went to see Hades.”

“I bet THAT was a lot of fun.”

“It wasn’t that bad, not at first. He seemed to be really open and honest with me. Of course, his suggestion was that I let them ALL die. I guess so his position as God of the Underworld would be justified. But then Ares showed up.”

“Still mad?”

“Sort of. But this time it was more at Hades than me. They ended up arguing about how many I should let die and how many I should Heal. As I said, Hades wanted all of them dead. But Ares wanted them all to live to fight again. He said that the more soldiers there were, then the more deaths there would be, more than enough to satisfy Hades. Then Hades came back saying that if I didn’t let any of them die, then there would be none to deliver to Tartarus, and no heroes for the Elysian Fields. And they went back and forth for like that I don’t know how long. After a while I just slipped away. I don’t think they even missed me.”

“Well, I think I may have a solution, if you want to hear it.”

“Of course I do! What is it?”

“Why not just concentrate on the villages and towns and just stay completely away from the battlefields? That way, when you heal the sick or injured, you’ll know they’re the ones who need it.”

“But what about . . . ?”

“Gabrielle, just last night you were complaining that you were doing Celesta’s job. So, let her do it!”

“But . . . .”

“But what? Gabrielle, you can’t have it both ways. If you want to continue to Heal, then Heal the ones you know are good and decent people, and leave the warriors and soldiers to Ares, Hades and Celesta. They’ve been doing it for thousands of years. It may not be perfect, but it’s been working.”

Gabrielle walked away from the camp into the woods. She needed to be alone to think.

While she waited for Gabrielle, Xena picked up rock that would be good to use for a honing stone, sat down by the campfire and began needlessly sharpening the blade of her sword. After a while she used part of her blanket to polish it. Then turned to her Chakram. It was almost midday when Gabrielle returned. But before Xena had a chance to speak, Gabrielle did.

“We have to go. There’s a village in need of my services. A fever is attacking the children.”

“I’ll break camp . . . .” Xena started to say.

“There’s no time.” Gabrielle replied, and taking Xena’s hand they disappeared in a flash of gold and silver sparkles.

 


	3. "You Killed My Father!"

  
**Chapter Three**   
**"You Killed My Father!"**   


 

As the two of them appeared out of thin air, several people approached Xena and Gabrielle, curious, and a bit afraid.

Gabrielle spoke to one of the women, “I know you have children who are suffering from a severe fever. I’m here to do what I can.”

“Who are you?”

“My name is Gabrielle, and I’ve often been called the Goddess of Heal . . . .”

“Don’t let her near your children!” One man yelled out. “She’s here to put the ones with the fever to death!”

Gabrielle was shocked at the accusation. “No! You’re wrong! I’m here to Heal them.”

A small crowd began to form, some were carrying small children and babies.

“Don’t believe her!” The same man shouted. “I saw her on the battle field only yesterday. She would lay her hands on the wounded soldiers and a blackness would envelop them, killing them. And then she would move on to the next, and the next after that, leaving only the dead behind her. She is a Goddess of Death for sure.”

“No!” Gabrielle tried to explain, “That’s not how it was. I was Healing. The only ones I let die were the ones I had brought back several times. It should have been their time to Cross Over long before . . . .”

Suddenly Gabrielle was hit with a fist-sized stone that was thrown by a boy not yet into his teens.

“You killed my father!” He shouted at her, tears running down his face.

And he threw a second, then a third rock. Gabrielle didn’t bother to avoid being hit. She could sense the boy’s anger and frustration. She took a step toward him to try to explain again why she did what she did, but the men formed a wall between her and the women and children.

“We don’t want you here! We leave our babies’ destinies to the Fates, not to some murderous god!”

Gabrielle turned away from the crowd to whisper to Xena. “Xena, what should I do? I can’t force these people to let me Heal their children. But I can’t just leave knowing so many of them will die!”

“Gabrielle, I don’t see where you have much of a choice, unless you can Heal them from here.”

Gabrielle shook her head. “I’ve tried. It’s one of the few limitations on my powers, I have to be touching them to Heal them. Xena, will you talk to them? Try to explain, if you can?”

“I’ll try.”

Xena turned to the crowd, now larger as most of the village men were gathered to protect their precious children.

“Listen to me! You’re all wrong about her. She’s here to Heal your sick children, not kill them. What happened with the soldiers has nothing to do with her curing the fever.”

But the crowd wasn’t listening. And the more Xena tried to explain, the angrier they became.

“It’s no use,” Xena said to Gabrielle. “They won’t listen to reason. I don’t think we have any choice but to leave.”

“But . . . .”

“Gabrielle, they won’t let you. There’s nothing we can do.”

As Xena and Gabrielle were talking, the crowd, sensing that the goddess and her companion were about to leave, began to disperse.

“We might as well go,” Xena said. “There’s no sense in trying to talk to any of them, their minds are made up.”

Sadly, Gabrielle agreed and was about to take Xena’s hand to teleport themselves away when a young woman in her late teens, ran up to them and fell to her knees, gripping Gabrielle’s ankles and began pleading to her.

“Oh, Goddess, please! My baby’s so sick, I beg of you to help her!”

Over and over she repeated herself, praying that Gabrielle would Heal her sickly child. Gabrielle bent down and pulled the woman to her feet.

“There’s no need to do that. I’m not very comfortable with all the bowing down.”

The woman grabbed onto Gabrielle’s hands, kissed them, and began begging again.

As she did one of the men saw what she was doing and yelled out to her. “You! Girl! Get away from there!”

She looked momentarily at the man and the turned back to Gabrielle, pleading even more fervently, fearful that they would leave. When the man saw this he stormed over to them, intending to forcible drag the girl away, but Xena stepped in front of him, not speaking, but glaring at him with a cold, icy stare.

After several moments, he made a disgusting noise and stomped off, saying over his shoulder, “Go on! Let her kill that baby! It should have died months ago, anyway!”

“Where’s your baby?” Gabrielle asked gently.

“This way.” She answered, and led them to a small, one room cottage. Next to the fireplace was a crude, makeshift cradle. The girl lifted her baby up and handed her to Gabrielle.

“What’s your name?” Gabrielle asked as she took the baby.

“It’s Gabriana.” She replied.

“And your baby’s name?”

“She doesn’t have one. When she was born, everyone thought she would die, and they said it would be bad luck to name her, so I never did.”

Gabrielle unwrapped the infant to get a better look at her. “She’s so tiny! And so frail. Did that man say she was a few months old?”

“She’s five months old.” Gabriana said.

“Five months?! I would have said five WEEKS old!”

Gabrielle put the baby against her chest, cuddling her. “Oh, my.” Gabrielle said, dismayed. “She is so very sick.”

“What’s wrong with her?” Xena asked.

“Her heart is weak. Her lungs barely work. Her liver is damaged, as are her kidneys, and just about everything else. It’s a wonder she’s lived this long.”

“Maybe she was waiting for you.” Xena suggested.

Gabrielle gave Xena a warm smile, then sat down in the only chair, still holding her close. As she did a faint violet glow surrounded the infant.

“This may take a while. There’s a lot to do.” Gabrielle said as she closed her eyes.

Xena and Gabriana sat down on a bench next to the table. After a short while, Xena removed her sword, Chakram, and breastplate.

“Where’s your husband?” Xena asked.

“Dead, I suppose. He left about a year ago. Soldiers came here looking for men to join with them to go to some war somewhere. They said it was to fight for glory of Ares. Most of the men in our village are worshippers of Ares. He said he’d be back in half a year, but . . . .”

“He left knowing you were with child?”

“He didn’t know. And I didn’t either until he’d been gone a couple of months.”

“Was your baby always so sickly?”

Gabriana nodded. “When the soldiers left, almost all of the younger, able-bodied men left with them. So when the harvest came, there weren’t enough of us, so much of it rotted in the fields. And then I got sick, but we had no one to minister to our illnesses. And there wasn’t enough to eat, which made things even worse. So when my baby was born, she was so tiny and sickly no one expected her to live through the night.”

 


	4. A Final Healing

 

  
**Chapter Four**   
**A Final Healing**

The sun was beginning to set when Gabrielle stirred. As she did, the baby let out a loud cry, and then continued to cry. Both Xena and Gabriana were startled after the long silence.

“Never has she cried so loud!” Gabriana said with amazement, as she took her baby from Gabrielle.

“I think she may hungry.” Gabrielle said. “Do you have enough milk for her?”

“Yes. I always had plenty, maybe that was why she lived as long as she did.” And then she sat down in the chair to let her baby nurse.

“Well, I guess saving one child is better than none.” Xena said.

“I wish it could have been more.”

Just then there was a knock on the door. Xena pulled her sword from its scabbard and opened it cautiously. Several women pushed their way into to small hut and went to see for themselves that Gabrielle had, indeed, Healed the baby.

“I KNEW I heard her cry out.” One woman said, to no one. “I was listening at the window.”

Then another turned to Gabrielle. “I have two children who are so very sick with the fever. Could you . . . Will you . . . ?”

“Of course I will.” Gabrielle said. “Bring them to me.”

Almost immediately, a half dozen children and babies were carried in by their mothers. Throughout the night, a steady stream of women and their children entered the overcrowded cottage for Gabrielle to work her magic on them. Many of them had illnesses other than the fever – coughs, head pain, rashes, vomiting, and broken bones and sprains. After the children, some of the adults were taken care of.

“Where are they all coming from?” Xena asked one woman. “I didn’t think this village was that large.”

“The word is spreading to the neighboring farms. But they have to be careful not to let the men know they are bringing their children here, to be Healed. Their husbands and fathers are still calling her the Goddess of Death.”

 

By daybreak Gabrielle’s work was done, and the cabin was empty except for Gabrielle, Xena, Gabriana and her baby, who was nursing again for the third time.

“Goddess?” Gabriana said, hesitantly, “I have thought of a name for my baby, if it is all right with you.”

Gabrielle was puzzled.

“I have decided to name her Gabriella, after you, it you don’t mind.”

Gabrielle smiled gently. “Of course I don’t mind. But only if you do one thing for me.”

“Just ask it.”

“Love her, protect her, and raise her up to be loving and caring and compassionate.”

Gabriana smiled brightly. “Oh, that will be so easy! I don’t know how to thank you.”

“No thanks are needed. Just take good care of your daughter.”

Gabrielle turned to Xena. “Well, I think we’ve done everything we can here. Ready to go?”

“Ready if you are,” Xena replied as she put on her armor and sword.

When the two of them left the hut, a half dozen old men were waiting for them. Xena didn’t draw her sword, but was on alert.

“Goddess,” the one in front said, “We, the Elders of this village, wish to express our eternal gratitude and thanks to you for all you’ve done.”

“You’re welcome. But where were all of you yesterday when we were being harassed by the other men of this village.”

“Unfortunately, we don’t have the influence we used to have, not since this worship of Ares grew so strong. But believe me, they don’t speak for the majority of us. His followers are just so – ruthless, and uncompromising.”

“Yes, I know. We’ve had run-ins with Ares on more than one occasion.”

“Is there any way we can repay you for everything you’ve done?”

“I wish I could tell you to never teach your children to make war. But I realize that with all the bandits and warlords there are, it is necessary to be able to defend your homes and families. But you can do this – teach them to fight only when necessary -- in defense, not in anger or for conquest. And never make war on the weak and helpless.”

“We shall try our best. No, we WILL do as you say. And one other thing, if you permit it. We would like to erect a shrine in your honor, to remind all of us of the good you have done here, and of your words of wisdom.”

“Well, unlike the other gods, I’m not comfortable being worshipped, but maybe just a small one will be all right. Very small.”

“As you wish, and again, our many thanks.”

Gabrielle nodded to them, then turned to Xena, and was about to take her hand to transport them back to their camp when out of the corner of her eye she saw the same boy who had thrown the rocks at her when she and Xena arrived the day before. Gabrielle turned to face him, and again, he angrily threw a large rock at her. She put up one hand, and a very pale yellow beam of light streamed out and stopped the rock in midair halfway between them. Slowly the rock returned to the boy, stopping an arm’s length away from him, then dropped to the ground.

No one spoke as Gabrielle’s and the boy’s eyes locked on each other. Gradually, the boy’s look of hatred and distain changed to one of sadness. He broke the eye contact and lowered his head, dropping the other rocks. And as tears ran down his cheeks, he turned away and melted into the crowd.

“What did you do?” Xena asked.

“I drained the rage away to allow his grief to come to the surface. He has never mourned for his dead father. And now, I think our work here is really done.”

Then taking Xena by the hand, the two of them disappeared in a shower of gold and silver sparkles.

 

**More to Come**


End file.
